– you drink beer from a longneck bottle because your doctor told you to distance yourself from alcohol.
– You swear well
– you think St. Patrick’s Day is THE major holiday of the year.
– you believe God created Ireland and the rest happened by accident.
– You know what hurling is…

– When after every sentence you say … Iyaaahh!
– You too believe traffic lanes, stop signs and one way streets are mere suggestions and that sidewalks were meant to drive on or they wouldn’t have paved them.
– The footprints on the toilet seat are your own
– You no longer wait in line, but immediately go to the head of the queue
– You habitually punch all the buttons as you …

– You get most of your news from TF1, even if you live in America.
– Offer red wine to a ten-year old, and they would prefer white, thank you.
– Calling somebody by his/her name implies that you know him/her pretty well.
– You feel that your kind of people aren’t being listened to enough …

– You point with your lips.
– Your mom or sister is a nurse.
– If you go to party, you’re an hour late and there’s still nobody there!
– You eat using your hands and have it down to technique.
– You say “comfort room” instead of “bathroom.”
– Your other piece of luggage is a balikbayan box.
– You use a rock to scrub yourself…

– You know how baseball, basketball, and American football are played. If you’re male, you can argue intricate points about their rules.
– You learned to memorize the fifty states with a song.
– You count yourself fortunate if you get three weeks of vacation a year.
– You think that Beethoven is a cute St. Bernard dog
– You drive around looking for the closest parking…

– (For females) You’re parents would freak out if you wore a crop top baring your midriff but wearing a sari is perfectly acceptable
– (For females) Your brother had no curfew while you had to be home at 11pm
– You are ALWAYS taking off and putting on your shoes wherever you go
– When you were little you always wondered why your American friends…

* You know the meaning of the word “girt”.

* You believe that stubbies can be either drunk or worn.

* You think it’s normal to have a leader called Kevin.

* You waddle when you walk due to the 53 expired petrol discount vouchers stuffed in your wallet or purse.

* You believe it is appropriate to put a rubber in your son’s pencil case when he first attends school.

* When you hear that an Amer

– Your car costs more than your college education
– Your blood has a permanent vodka content level, no matter you have been drinking or not
– Any outfit you wear involves leather (even in the summer even when no coats are worn)
– Things you can’t live without include food…

– You can’t go more that five days without rice.
– You don’t have matching bedding.
– You don’t have matching dishes.
– You don’t have matching hangers in your closet.
– At least one person in your family owns or knows how to use a sewing machine.
– You never really bought a calendar in your life; you always got the free ones…

* You unwrap Christmas gifts very carefully, so you can save and reuse the wrapping next year.

* Your stove is covered with aluminum foil.

* You have a piano in your living room.

* You live with your parents and you are 30 years old.

* You always cook too much.

* You never discuss your love life with your parents.

* Your parents are never happy with your grades.

* You save your old Coke bo

– You think you are the king of gambler but lose all your money like the other ones.
– You call all white people Frenchmen
– You gamble with no strategy in the casino like a chick with no head
– People think you’re Paki or Indu
– You wonder why all other Asian ethnicity hate you
– You go to the temple because you think you’ll meet good girls…