Donald and Mike
Donald Trump and Mike Pence were traveling down Route 66 when Donald fell asleep at the wheel and crashed head on to oncoming traffic and they both died. When Donald and Mike reached the pearly gates of hell Mike said:
FunnyGuy
An Ice-Cream
An elderly lady walks into an ice cream parlor.
She says to the man behind the counter, “what flavors of ice cream do you have?”
Amazing Hairstylist
Amazing Hairstylist
The Female Teacher
A female teacher asking her students questions,
Teacher “what is in the sky and start with P”. One student said “plane”.
Jokes to your email!
That Cell-Phone
There are several men sitting around in the locker room of a Golf club.
There are several men sitting around in the locker room of a golf club.
A Ventriloquist in a Club
A ventriloquist was performing in a club telling dumb blonde jokes…
With his dummy on his knee, he begins his usual routine of dumb blonde jokes. Suddenly, a blond woman in the audience stands on her chair and starts shouting, “I’ve heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes! What makes you think you can stereotype women like that? What does the color of a person’s hair have to do with their
A Professor, a CEO, and a Janitor
A professor, a CEO, and a janitor are in a forest when they discover a magic fairy.
The fairy says “I will give you what you most desire if you do someone else’s job for a day.”
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Twenty Years Ago
A woman woke up in the middle of the night and found that her husband wasn’t there beside her.
She went downstairs and found him sitting in the kitchen, drinking coffee and looking thoughtful.
We all see things differently
A pessimist sees a dark tunnel.
An optimist sees light at the end of the tunnel.
Bear Exterminator
A man has a bear perched on the roof of his house. He has tried everything to get the bear off the house but nothing works. So finally he gives up and calls the bear exterminator.
The bear exterminator shows up in an old pickup with a huge cage in the back. After he surveys the situation he begins to unpack his truck. He takes out a wooden baseball bat, a shotgun, and a manegy old mean dog.
Jesus is Watching You
A burglar breaks into a dark house one night. He’s moving around in the dark, when he hears a calm voice say, “Jesus is watching you.”
The burglar freaks out, shines his flashlight around and spots a Parrot sitting in his cage. The parrot says again, “Jesus is watching you.”
In Russia
A tourist gets pulled over by a cop in Russia.
Cop: You were speeding! I am going to confiscate your driver’s license and I’m calling for a tow truck to take away your car.
Revenge
A 15-year old boy came home with a Porsche.
His parents began to yell and scream. “Where did you get that car?”
A Blonde Teenager
A blonde teenager, wanting to earn some extra money for the summer, decided to hire herself out as a “handy-woman”
She started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.
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In a Train Compartment in France
Four people are in a train compartment in France
There’s an attractive young woman, a plain older woman, a French man and an English man.
Cursed Prince
An evil witch put a curse on a prince so that he could only speak one word each year.
If he didn’t say anything for a year, he would be able to say two words the next year and so on.
