Complaining About Her Husband
An angry wife was complaining about her husband spending all his free time in a bar. So one night he took her along with him.
“What will you have?” he asked.
FunnyGuy
Didn’t Think
Jack, a handsome man, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM.
He sat down next to a blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV as the 10:00 news came on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump.
The Reason Why She Married Me
I asked my wife why she married me.
She said, “Because you’re really funny!”
Jokes to your email!
An Advertisement
A man placed an advertisement,
“Wife wanted”.
A Funny Student
Student: “Can I go to the bathroom?”
Teacher: “It’s ‘may.'”
This Is A Library
A man walks into a library and orders a hamburger.
The librarian says, “This is a library.”
Books About Paranoia
A man walks into a library and asks the librarian for books about paranoia.
She whispers, “They’re right behind you!”
In A Hairsalon
A man came to a hairdresser. He showed to the hairdresser with gestures that he was deaf and mute.
Fortunately, the hairdresser knew a few gestures in sign language. And started to communicate with the man.
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The Most Interesting Thing
Today I got a strong urge to buy my wife flowers.
She accepted them with tears in her eyes saying,
29th Of February
Yesterday my boss gave me the timetable.
I’ve checked it and told my boss that she made a mistake in the timetable because there is no 29th of February this year.
House Works
Today my husband and I decided to split up the house works.
So it was his turn to wash the dishes.
A Course In Self-Defense
The other day, 2 guys came up to me on the street. One of them said,
“Give me your mobile phone, quickly.”
Classmate
Today in the park, I met my classmate that I hadn’t seen since school ended.
She was with her husband and 2 kids, and I
A 26 Miles Long Swimming Race
An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman all entered a 26 miles long swimming race.
After 12 miles the Scottish man gets tired and drops out.
An Old Man
When I went to lunch today, I noticed an old man sitting on a park bench sobbing his eyes out. I stopped and asked him what was wrong. He told me,
“I have a 22 years old wife at home. She rubs my back every morning and then gets up and makes me pancakes, sausage, fresh fruit, and freshly ground coffee.”
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Question And Answer
Girl: So, how many times a day do you shave?
Man: Well, about 15-20 times every day.
