I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor’s office to tell me that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30 A.M. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45 A.M. The trip to the doctor’s office took about 35 minutes, so I didn’t have any time to spare.
A woman and a baby were in the doctor’s examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby’s first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed?
Sometimes women are overly suspicious of their husbands.
When Adam stayed out very late for a few nights, Eve became upset.
A man goes to a police station… “My wife is missing! She went out yesterday and has not come home…”
Sergeant at Police Station: “What is her height?”
Three rich guys bury a friend.
First throws a thousand bucks into the coffin, saying “I want you to never need anything in the next life”.
In the beginning
God said, “Adam, I want you to do something for Me.”
Adam said, “Gladly, Lord, what do You want me to do?”
A blonde walked into the dentist’s office and sat down in the chair.
The dentist said “Open Wide”
A blonde walks into a bar that has a sign marked: “For Men Only”.
“I’m sorry, ma’am,” says the bartender. “We only serve men in this place.”
Q: “Why did the computer go to the doctor?”
A: “Because it had a virus!”
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says,
“Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them.”
A guy and a blond are on a date, and after dinner and a movie, they head on up to that city’s makeout spot “Lookout Point”, where things get a little hot and heavy. Then the guy leans over,
A young woman goes to the hospital to have her baby. No husband or boyfriend is present. The woman has her baby and then the nurse comes in and says,
“I must warn you your baby is black.” The woman says
A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says,
“What’ll it be buddy?” The man says,
A guy spots a nice looking girl in a bar goes up and starts small talk. Seeing that she didn’t back off he asked her name.
“Carmen,” she replied.
Three men, a Canadian, Osama Bin Ladin and President Bush are out walking together one day. They come across a lantern and a Genie pops out of it.
“I will give each of you one wish, that’s three wishes total,” says the Genie.
There’s a big conference of beer producers. At the end of the day, all of the presidents of all beer companies decide to have a drink in a bar.
The president of ‘Budweiser’ orders a Bud, the president of ‘Miller’ orders a Miller Lite, Adolph Coors orders a Coors, and the list goes on. Then the waitress asks Arthur Guinness what he wants to drink, and much to everybody’s amazement, Mr. Guinness orders a Coke!
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