Classic Woman
Kris was getting annoyed and shouted upstairs to his wife,” Hurry up or we’ll be late.”
“Oh, be quiet,” replied his wife. “Haven’t I been telling you for the last hour that I’ll be ready in a minute?”
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Cute Names
Tom was invited to his friend’s house for dinner. He found that his buddy called his wife every cute name in the book: honey, darling, sweetheart, pumpkin, and baby. When she was in the kitchen…
Christmas One Q & A
What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
Claustrophobia!
Why does Santa have three gardens?
So he can ‘ho ho ho’!
Why did Santa’s helper see the doctor?
Because he had a low “elf” esteem!
What kind of motorbike does Santa ride?
…
Jokes to your email!
Drink beer
Three leaders of the big beer companies meet for a drink. The president of Budweiser orders a Bud, president of Millers orders a Millers, and the president of Coors orders a Coors. ..
Q and A
Q: What does Santa call his wife at tax time?
A: A dependent Claus.
Salary
Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources person asked a young engineer fresh out of MIT, “And what starting salary were you looking for?”…
Small Problem
Two man playing golf were held up by two women playing in front of them. One man said: “I’ll walk up to them and tell them to hurry up.” When he returned he said: “I have a problem…
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актёр
– Есть ли у России актёр, который может сравниться по масштабу своего дарования с Джеком Николсоном, Робертом ди Ниро, Леонардо ди Каприо?
– Есть, конечно.
– И кто же это, позвольте вас спросить?
– Жерар Депардье!
Blood test
Bill and Bob, two children, were sitting outside a clinic. Bill happened to be crying very loudly.
“Why are you crying?” Bob asked.
“I came here for a blood test,” sobbed Bill.
“So? Are you afraid?”
Walk in the space
Two astronauts were in a space ship circling high above the earth. One had to go on a space walk while the other stayed inside. When the space walker tried to get back inside the space ship, he discovered that the cabin door was locked, so he knocked….
Never argue
Q: What is the difference between a man who is buying a lottery ticket and a man who is arguing with his girlfriend?
A: The lottery ticket buyer has a chance to win!!
Revenge
A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, “Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?”
She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, “No, I won’t sleep with you tonight!” Everyone …
Armenian Radio Part 4
This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “Why do we need two central newspapers, Pravda (Truth) and Izvestiya (News) if both are organs of the same Party?”
We’re answering: “Because in Pravda there is no news, and in Izvestiya there is no truth.”
This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “What is it that starts …
Armenian Radio Part 3
This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “What is a Soviet musical duet?”
We’re answering: “It’s a musical quartet after a trip abroad.”
This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “How to find out the precise time of the day?”
We’re answering: “A few seconds before noon,…
Armenian Radio Part 2
This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “We are told that the communism is already seen at the horizon.” Then, what is a horizon?”
We’re answering: “Horizon is an imaginary line which moves away each time you approach it.”
This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “What should we do if the Western borders of the USSR were opened?”
We’re answering: “Rush to Siberia at once in order…
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Armenian Radio Part 1
This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “Will people have money when communism is built?”
We’re answering: “Some will, some will not.”
This is Armenian Radio; our listeners asked us: “Is it possible…
