We all see things differently
A pessimist sees a dark tunnel.
An optimist sees light at the end of the tunnel.
Bear Exterminator
A man has a bear perched on the roof of his house. He has tried everything to get the bear off the house but nothing works. So finally he gives up and calls the bear exterminator.
The bear exterminator shows up in an old pickup with a huge cage in the back. After he surveys the situation he begins to unpack his truck. He takes out a wooden baseball bat, a shotgun, and a manegy old mean dog.
Jesus is Watching You
A burglar breaks into a dark house one night. He’s moving around in the dark, when he hears a calm voice say, “Jesus is watching you.”
The burglar freaks out, shines his flashlight around and spots a Parrot sitting in his cage. The parrot says again, “Jesus is watching you.”
Jokes to your email!
In Russia
A tourist gets pulled over by a cop in Russia.
Cop: You were speeding! I am going to confiscate your driver’s license and I’m calling for a tow truck to take away your car.
Revenge
A 15-year old boy came home with a Porsche.
His parents began to yell and scream. “Where did you get that car?”
A Blonde Teenager
A blonde teenager, wanting to earn some extra money for the summer, decided to hire herself out as a “handy-woman”
She started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.
In a Train Compartment in France
Four people are in a train compartment in France
There’s an attractive young woman, a plain older woman, a French man and an English man.
SUPPORT=FUNNY
Cursed Prince
An evil witch put a curse on a prince so that he could only speak one word each year.
If he didn’t say anything for a year, he would be able to say two words the next year and so on.
Kids Reacts To Sour Compilation
Kids trying sour stuff first time
The Word’s Gassiest Baby
This baby can power a city
Arab Student
An Arab student emails his dad:
Dear Dad,
Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here, but Dad, I am a bit ashamed to arrive at my college with my pure-gold Ferrari when all my teachers and many fellow students travel by train.
During the Party
A rich millionaire decides to throw a massive party for his 50th birthday, so during this party, he grabs the microphone and he announces to his guests that down in the garden of his mansion he has a swimming pool with two crocodiles in it.
That was Enough…
After having their 11th child, a redneck couple decided that was enough…
…as they could not afford a larger bed. So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn’t want to have any more children.
Parrot for Only $50
A man walks into a pet shop and sees a parrot for only $50.
Standing next to the cage the man asks, “I wonder why he is so cheap?” “Because I am defective,” came the reply. “I’ve got no legs.” A little surprised the man asked, “Well how do you stay on your perch?” The parrot draws him closer and whispers, “I have a big penis. I just wrap it around the bar and stay put…
SUPPORT=FUNNY
In The Library
A guy asked a girl in a university library: “Do you mind if I sit beside you?” The girl replied with a loud voice: “NO! I DON’T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!” All the students in the library started looking at the guy; he was pretty embarrassed. After a while, the girl walked quietly over to the
Bragging
A Canadian man, an American man, a Japanese man, and a Middle Eastern man walk into a bar. They all have a couple of beers and get to bragging. The American guy boasts, “I’m so lucky, I have 4 beautiful children, one more and I would have a basketball team.” Not to be outdone…
