Best Naughty Jokes on the internet. An ever-growing collection of extremely funny jokes.
A girl was a prostitute, but she didn’t want her grandma to know.
One day, the police raided a whole group of prostitutes at a sex party in a hotel and the girl was among them.
The police took them outside and had all the prostitutes line up along the driveway when suddenly, the girl’s grandma came by and saw her granddaughter.
A guy walked into a bar with a monkey.
The monkey grabbed some olives off the bar and ate them.
Then he grabbed some sliced limes and ate them. He then jumped onto the pool table and grabbed one of the balls.
To everyone’s amazement, he stuck it in his mouth and somehow swallowed it whole.
In Soviet Russia, gay sex gets you arrested. In America, getting arrested gets you gay sex.
A drunk naked woman jumped into a taxi and laid down on the back seat.
The cab driver, an old gentleman, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman.
Programming is like sex.
I mean when you make one mistake you should end up supporting it for the rest of your life.
A few days ago I went to the doctor for a prostate exam.
During the exam, he said,
“It’s not unusual to become aroused or even ejaculate.”
A couple was working in the garden. The husband looked at his wife and said,
“Dear, your butt is really big. I can even bet that it is bigger than the barbecue.”
One day a man got on a bus. There were only women and girls, but the driver. The man declared a raid. After everyone gave their money, their jewerly and other expensive thing, the man said,
A very hot blond went to a market and asked for two bananas. The shop assistant gave her three bananas.
Blond, “But I’ve asked just for two bananas.”
Two boys are talking together. One says to the other,
“I bet you’re still a virgin.”
A little boy was playing in the yard and suddenly killed a honeybee.
His father saw him killing the honeybee and said,
“Not any honey for one week!”
Two midgets go into a hotel, with two girls. They take them to their separate hotel rooms.
The first midget is unable to get an erection. His depression is enhanced by the fact that, from the next room, he hears his friend’s voice,
Two rural women were digging potatoes in the field one day. The first pulled out two big ones. She turned to the second and said,
“Hey you know, these potatoes remind me of my husband’s balls.”
Four nuns were standing in line at the gates of heaven. St Peter asks the first,
“Have you ever sinned?”
A woman went to her doctor, complaining that her husband is 300% impotent.
The doctor puzzled said, “I’m not sure I understand what you mean.”
Two missionaries get caught in Africa by a tribe of primitives. The chief of the tribe says
“We’ve captured you in our land! I shall give you a choice. ‘Death’ or ‘ugu’?”
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