During The New Lockdown
During the lockdown, doctors said I could go to the market with just a mask and everything will be ok…
I felt so stupid… Others had clothes on them!
Funny Stories
Short Funny Stories From Real Life That Will Crack You Up
The Subscriber Is Unavailable
A woman wanted to call her husband but understood that she was out of credit. She asked her son to use his phone and to call his daddy. After the boy had called, he came back and said that there was a lady that picked up daddy’s phone the three times he tried reaching dad on the mobile. Hearing this the woman got angry.
In A Cafe
A man walks into a cafe and orders a cocktail. He takes his first sip and sets it down.
While he is looking around the cafe, a hot girl grabs the drink pours it on his head, and stabs him with the umbrella.
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A Woman Was Cheating On Her Husband
A woman was cheating her husband and said, “Do you want to see a crumpled-up $50?”
He said “Yes”
My Next Patient
As a brain wave technology specialist, I often ask postoperative patients to smile to make sure their facial nerves are intact.
It always struck me as odd to be asking this question right after brain surgery, so a colleague suggested me to ask patients to show me their teeth.
My Dad’s Jokes
What I remember about my dad’s jokes is my mother’s reaction.
While others were howling at one of his jokes, my mom would always respond,
Cardiac Problems
A paramedic team was called to an emergency. Before they took the patient to the hospital, one from the team asked the patient’s wife,
“Does your husband have any cardiac problems?”
Is There Any Question
A young man walks into a singles bar with a roll of quarters taped inside the crotch of his jeans. He looks around, then sits next to a very attractive woman there. He was very pleased with himself after he noticed her constantly glancing down at his crotch.
SUPPORT=FUNNY
The New CEO
A new CEO at a company decided to fire all of the slackers, and when he gets done with that, he finds a dude leaning on his desk. He thinks,
“What is he doing here!?”
My Change
In a restaurant, this man received the bill, which was 15 Dollars. He gave 100 Dollars to the waiter. The waiter took it and just smiled.
The man asked, “Where is my change.”
What Are You Doing
A woman arrives in the kitchen and sees her husband with a fly swatter and asks,
“What are you doing?”
A Pet
A drunk man brings a sheep home, tells his wife it’s a pet. She asks,
“Where are you going to keep it?”
A Young Boy
A policeman caught a young boy with a gun and a fox in his hands.
“Hey, listen to me,” said the policeman, “Whatever you do to that poor creature, I shall do the same to you”
For A Parking Spot
An atheist goes to a shopping mall.
And there is no parking spot, so he says “God, if you give me a parking spot, I will convert myself and become Christian”.
And So The Man Was Naked
After a long night of drinking for a woman, this man took advantage by giving her a ride home.
After the walk to the door, the woman asked him in for a nightcap. One thing led to another and so the man was naked.
The Monkeys
A man entered a pet shop to buy a monkey. The shop owner pointed to 3 identical looking monkeys on a perch and said,
“The monkey on the left costs 500 dollars.”
