Best Classic Jokes on the internet. An ever-growing collection of extremely funny jokes.
One day, a scuba diver was enjoying the aquatic world 30 feet underwater. He noticed a guy at the same depth he was, with no scuba gear on whatsoever. The diver went down to 60 feet, and noticed the guy headed down with him. The diver descended to 90 feet and saw the guy still headed down toward him. The diver finally stopped at 130 feet underwater and found the guy right next to him. The scuba d
Little Johnny comes home from Catholic school with a black eye. His father sees it and says, “Johnny, how many times do I have to tell you not to fight with the other boys?”
“But Dad,” said Johnny, “It wasn’t my fault. We were all in church saying our prayers. We all stood up and my teacher in front …
An elderly woman went to her local doctor’s office and asked to speak with her doctor. When the receptionist asked why she was there, she replied,
“I’d like to have some birth control pills.”…
The bride said she wanted three children,while the young husband said two would be enough for him.
They discussed this discrepancy for a few minutes…
TOP TEN THINGS THAT MEN UNDERSTAND ABOUT WOMEN
Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist. If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for five years….
Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserved complaining and self- pitying.
She moaned to her mom…
The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, so too the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $10 the first time. Anybody caught breaking this rule the second time will be fined $50….
A little boy, at a wedding looks at his mom and says, “Mommy, why does the bride wear white?”
His mom replies, “The bride is in white because…
A tandem rider is stopped by a police car.
“What’ve I done, officer?” asks the rider.
“Perhaps you didn’t notice…
A ducks walks into a bar and asks, “Got any grapes?”
The bartender, confused, tells the ducks that no, his bar doesn’t serve grapes. The duck thanks him and leaves.
The next day, the duck returns and says, “Got any grapes?”
A woman meets a man in a bar.
They talk; they connect; they end up leaving together.
They get back to his place, and as he shows her around his apartment, she notices that one wall of his bedro
A man approached a very beautiful woman in the large supermarket and said, “I’ve lost my wife here in the supermarket. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?”
So a bus full of ugly people are driving along a cliffside, when suddenly a landslide knocks them off and they crash into the ocean. Everyone dies.
When they get up to heaven to meet their maker, he says, “Since you have suffered in your lives, I will grant you each one wish before you enter heaven.”…
Fanny jokes and images directly to your inbox.
Daily Jokes to your inbox!
