A journalist decides he wants to write a book about shepherds. So, he decides to travel the world to interview different shepherds.

His first stop is somewhere in the plains of Asia and he finds a lonely sheepherder, tending his flock.

“Hi sir, I am writing a book about shepherds like yourself, all across the world. Is it ok if I ask you a few questions?”

The shepherd nods.

“Well, I notice it’s just you and the sheep out here. Has it always been this way?”

The shepherd says, “yes. I’ve always been a shepherd. My father was a shepherd. And his father before that. It’s the only life I know.”

“Wow. Interesting.” The journalist says, taking notes. “Does it ever get lonely?”

“Well sure, sometimes.”

“So what do you do for the company?”

“What do you mean?” The shepherd asks.

“I mean like, it’s just you and the sheep out here, what do you do if you get horny?”

“Oh. I just fuck the sheep.” The shepherd says nonchalantly.

“WHAT?” The journalist says.

“Yes. I mean, that’s what you’re asking right?”

“Well sure. I guess I just didn’t expect that answer.” The journalist is taking notes and looks at him and says, “if you don’t mind me asking, how exactly does that work?”

The shepherd looks at him perplexed and says, “it’s easy, really. You just run them around in circles until they get tired and then get behind them and do your business.”

“This is incredible. I did not realize that.” The journalist exclaims and they chat for a while before he thanks the shepherd for his time and gets on his way.

He then interviews a lonely shepherd in the narrow cliffs of New Zealand’s South Island. and he asks the Shepard point-blank: “hello sir, sorry to bother but I’ve been interviewing shepherds across the world and I was wondering if I could ask you a few questions?”

The shepherd says, “sure mate.”

“So it’s just you and the sheep out here, huh?”

“Yep.”

“Wow.”

“Generations – my family is a legacy of shepherds.”

“That’s incredible. Listen, I’ll cut to the chase. I talked to a shepherd and he says that it’s so lonely, his only option is to, you know…”

“…Fuck the sheep?” The shepherd finishes the sentence before the journalist can.

“Yes! Exactly. Jeez – you too?”

“Sure, when it comes down to it.” The shepherd replies.

“Well – just out of curiosity, how do you do it?”

“How do I do it?” The shepherd asks. “It’s easy! You just run them up to the edge of the cliff and they stop and you get behind em and do your business!”

The journalist laughs and shakes his head and leaves. He can’t believe what he has learned in a short time. He travels the world and all the shepherds are telling him the same story. He changed the narrative of his book and presses on. His final stop is a lonely shepherd in Scotland. He walks up to him and cuts right to the chase. “Excuse me, sir,” he says to the burly shepherd, tending his flock. “I’m a journalist writing a book about shepherds and I had a quick question.”

“Well, go on with it.” The shepherd says, hardly paying attention.

“Well, I’ve talked to just about every shepherd you can imagine, and I’ve realized that literally all of them have had some sort of “relations” with their sheep.”

The shepherd turns around and stares at him.

“I don’t mean any disrespect, I’m just asking if you do the same.”

The shepherd raises his brow and says, “what exactly are you asking, sonny?”

The journalist says, sincerely, “I’m asking you if you fuck your sheep.”

There’s a long, awkward pause. The Scottish shepherd takes one step towards him and puts his massive hand on his shoulder and starts laughing and says, “Of course! This is a lonely life! Of course, I take these little biddies down from time to time.”

The journalist, relieved that he’s not angry, nervously laughs as well. “Wow! You too huh? Incredible. 100% Beastiality mode between you crazy shepherds. This is wild. Hey, before I go…. one last question: How do you do it?”

“What do you mean?” The shepherd asks.

“I mean I’ve heard all these stories about -”

“I just flip em over and I fuck em!” The Scot laughs.

The journalist is incredulous, “wait, what? Flip em over? You mean you do it from the front?”

“Of course!”

“I’ve talked to countless shepherds and literally all of them do it from behind!”

“WHAT? And miss out on all the kissin’?”